He Said She Said - Watching TV

He Said:

Does anyone remember what life was like before Television: families talking to each other, neighbors being neighborly, reading a book either for entertainment or for knowledge? Some people argue that we don't need books anymore because we have the internet. I am doing my part. I am buying every book I want to read some day. So far I have accumulated thousands of titles. Back to television. Everyone I know gets up in the morning and turns on the TV while getting ready for work (except the non-working friends) and you know who you are. When they come home from work, the first thing they do is turn on their TV. When they go to bed they set the timer on their TV so they can go to sleep. I call this death by Letterman. Pardon me, I meant sleep by Letterman. When Dena (my fiance') wants to go to sleep, she just asks me to talk to her or tell one of my famous stories,which always put her to sleep. I will admit that I occasionally watch Cops or Forensic Science or maybe an episode of Survivors, or maybe The Amazing Race. Dena does make me watch all of the Monday night sitcoms, which I find amusing in some ways; but to just turn the TV on for noise sake seems a disgrace to our own intelligence. I mean you do have the dog barking (incessantly), your son to talk to, or I can always tell you one of my many stories. I am not superior to anyone else, I just want to go back to an easier, friendlier, talk and listen relationship with family, friends, and neighbors. Now is that asking too much? If I could shoot all TV's, it would certainly put me out of my misery. It would also help a lot of other people to get a life. However, some people would go into withdrawals without their TV's and my killing the TV's before the conclusion of this seasons' Survivor would only result in opening the killing season on me. Then I would end up being on TV.Wouldn't that be ironic?

She Said:

Okay Mr. Pseudo Intellectual who thinks he's above TV. I've got two words for you: CLOSET WATCHER. You go around telling everybody you don't watch TV. You say you would rather read, when what you are reading is the TV Guide to find out when the next episode of Cops or World's Most Famous Car Chases comes on. You don't necessarily sneak around like a closet eater, but you act like you don't watch TV when in reality you do watch it. Who has fifteen boxes of recorded tapes of the OJ Trial? You recorded them off of WHAT? Oh, I remember, you recorded them off of the TV. Just because you don't watch it at the time, does not mean you are not watching it off of the TV! What about all of those times when you have meetings and you ask me to record Survivor or The Amazing Race? When you come over to watch those recorded shows, that is a form of TV watching to me. Let's take a look: THE CLASS, HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER, TWO AND A HALF MEN, CHRISTINA, WHAT ABOUT BRIAN, GREY'S ANATOMY, SURVIVOR, THE AMAZING RACE, NANCY GRACE, FORENSIC SCIENCE, and COPS. The last time I looked, these were all TV shows, not radio shows. As for you shooting your TV, you are much too frugal with money to destroy property. I have never seen you shoot a gun so you are probably a poor shot, and the biggest reason you won't kill your TV is because there is no TV Hunting Season Guide to tell you when to hunt and God forbid you miss a season of 24 or LOST. You need to dump this TV thing and if you want me, I'll be in my room watching DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES, which I am beginning to feel like!