Sunday, November 29, 2009

What Christmas means to me...you light up my life?

He Said


Christmas only comes once a year and as I look at

my calendar I notice that we are here. I love

Christmas. I love the sounds, the music, the

crisp air around us, the joy of giving, etcetera.

Now let me tell you the things that I dread the most:

too many people getting in my way in the stores

and on the roads.

I am a Christmas eve shopper and one thing that I

don't need is a bunch of last minute shoppers

getting in my way. Also, what is the deal with

everyone telling me what to get them? I should be

able to get them whatever I think they deserve.

Another thing I hate is that I have been seeing Christmas

decorations up in the stores since August. I

couldn't enjoy Halloween this year because of all

the Christmas carols being played throughout the stores.

Christmas cards were on sale at the dollar

store before I had even made out my Christmas

card list. For my friends out there thinking, that's funny,

I didn't receive a card from him last year, don't worry,

I didn't send any. I am just saying that if I was

going to send them, all those early card displays

would turn me off. I hate to get into a big deal about

this because I know what she will say but, we have

been a couple for 10 or 11 years now so here goes.

Every year, and I do mean every year, she puts white

lights on her tree, and white lights on her

door , and white lights on her mantle wreathe.

There are even white lights up and down her sidewalk so

it looks like an airport runway. I haven't said much

about it, but Christmas is not going to ever be Christmas

for me until I see some lights that are colorful. Red,

yellow, blue, orange, and green, colors is what Christmas

is really all about.

I need bright lights and colors. Don't get me wrong ,

I do believe in the Christian part of Christmas and

I do know the true meaning of Christmas; it's just

that all this other stuff takes away from my Christmas

spirit. I don't want to be bah humbug; however, I

am starting to feel like the spirit of Christmas past

and that is not right. I need prettier and more

colorful Christmas tree lights in my life.



She Said


I think colorful Christmas tree lights is the least

of your worries. I have already bought most of my

Christmas presents this year, including your present.

I have given you many hints throughout the year

about what I want Santa to bring me. With all of your

fussing and whining about why Christmas isn't fair to you,

I'm not sure you're listening to me. Maybe I should get

a GPS for you just to see if that is one female voice you

will listen to and follow directions precisely. Why not buy your

presents early when there is a better selection instead

of those loved ones on your Christmas list having

to settle for leftovers on Christmas Eve? That, alone,

is reason to avoid the last minute rush. Besides, if

your children and I don't give you a list, there's no

telling what we would get, given your eclectic taste.

I don't need an electric scarf that plays Christmas

carols and your children don't need a tie with

Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer with a blinking red nose.

As far as you not enjoying Halloween, you loved every

minute of driving the cart through Target

buying candy that was reduced. I didn't hear you

humming Christmas carols then; you were a man on a

mission. And Christmas cards.....I can guarantee you

that your friends will not receive a card from you

until the price of stamps goes down. Now lets talk

about white lights on MY tree, in MY house. Until

you walk me down the aisle and start paying MY electric

bills and buying MY tree decorations, you

can keep riding around town looking at other peoples'

yard decorations in color. I like MY white lights.

You said the colored lights are what you were used

to growing up...have you noticed that your mother

has all white lights this year? If you're the voice

of Christmas past, this is the voice of Christmas future,

if you know what I mean. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.