Pride or Just Cheap?

He Said

Here is the deal. I have no pride. I don't mow my grass enough.
The inside of my car is a wreck.
I never spend enough time cleaning my house. I never seem to
care about anything ...she says.
One thing about writing this column is that it gives us a chance
to explore the inside and the outside of each others' personality
traits. I know you are a neat freak because I say it  every month.
That's your personality but it isn't mine.  While living in New
York, if I wanted to eat a hot dog for lunch, I just went out on
the street, walked up to the hot dog vendor, bought a hot dog
and ate it right on the street corner. If people saw me it did
not matter to me. I wanted a kosher hot dog for lunch.
I was usually in a three piece suit.
I can't think of many things that I won't do because I'm afraid 
that people might be judging me.
You would say that I don't care or that I don't have any pride.

What is pride? To me, pride is when you try to impress your
friends or uppity people around you who are trying to impress you.
I go into a department store looking for a shirt that DOESN'T
have a trade name sewn on the pocket because I don't need to
impress my friends with a shirt that I bought and overpaid for.
Some people are in the store looking for a designer shirt so they
can pay twice the price to impress their
friends and family. That just isn't me.

I am telling you all of this because I told you on a Sunday that
I wanted to get a hot dog for lunch, and you suggested that I
get a box to go. I guess you didn't want to be seen standing
up eating a hot dog in Sunday dress and heels. You didn't have
to say it, but the inference was clear “I don't care where I eat
but I don't want to be seen eating a hot dog at a hot dog place
on Sunday.”
As I said in the beginning, I must not have very much pride.
Imagine eating a hot dog, in public, where everyone can see.
What is the world coming to?  
I have a plan. Next time I will go to a fancy restaurant, ask
for a to go box, buy my hot dog and put it in the box. Then I
can pretend I am eating food from the "fancy place" when actually
I get to eat what I really want. See, I do have pride. It just works differently from yours.




She Said

I am really surprised that you can even spell the word Pride,
much less define it. It is not so much that you don't have any
pride. We have had to come home from a restaurant because a
speck of spaghetti sauce got on the front of your shirt and
you wouldn't go out in a public place because you were so 
concerned that someone might see that little speck of red.
That's pride; I'm glad you're particular about your appearance. 
As far as the hot dog episode, if the truth is known, I was not
really in the mood for a hot dog that day. With you, it doesn't
matter how much food cost as long as you get what you want.
You don't like burned food (sometimes it's just a little brown,
to me). You like a LOT of ice in your drinks.
You want all of your food to be hot at the same time.
You don't want the table next to you who arrived AFTER you
to be served BEFORE YOU. I can accept all of these personality
quirks as long as you don't make me stand up and eat a hot dog
dressed in church clothes.  
I understand your need to search for hours for a shirt that has
no name on the pocket to prove some kind of point. Maybe that
is reverse pride, so you don't have to be part of the crowd who
wants the best of everything, or maybe you don't understand
that they feel that the quality of a better known shirt will
wear longer.
Whatever the case, I am tired of trying to be your mother all
the time so the next time you want to eat a hot dog for a Sunday
lunch, feel free to do so. But when we drive up to the fancy
restaurant to get your to go box, just let me out and come
pick me up later. 
For me it is not about pride. For me it is eating a hot meal
that will sustain me until dinner, with atmosphere, ambiance
and people surrounding me with taste and charm.

You think you have all of that with your hot dog place.
My taste runs just a tad differently from yours.

I call it pride, you call it fancy or snooty.