April 2009 Showcase  He Said She Said
He Said 
It never ceases to amaze me the way people go 
out of their wayto make it difficult for others 
to achieve their goals. Maybe it's a pet peeve of mine 
but I would like for slow drivers to move out of 
the fast lane when cars are behind them 
and need to get by. Why do they insist on speeding 
up only when another car is trying to pass by?  
They are already not doing the speed limit while 
holding up traffic and making a nuisance of themselves. 
But as I try to ease around them, all of a sudden they 
are in a rush. 
Around here, beating me from the stoplight is a sport. 
I can be beside someone at a stoplight, even if they 
are in a 1943 Studebaker, and they want to race me
off the light. If I am in a department store pushing 
my buggy down the aisle, I will inevitably run into 
someone talking to a person they have not seen in a 
couple of hours.  Usually they are chatting and showing 
pictures of either the baby or vacation photos from 
the fifties. And please don't get me started
on cell phones. How did these people survive and who 
did they talk to while shopping for groceries and 
watching a movie before the invention of cell phones? 
I don't want to get all keyed up about these trivial 
things but I am thinking about calling my doctor and 
asking for a prescription of Prozac or something just 
to calm my nerves. I am not sure how much longer
I can take this junk. I am thinking about writing a 
letter to the editor but lately that isn't even working. 
I am staying in today and going back to the couch to lie down.
She Said
You're going back to the couch to lie down? 
When did you get up? The only reason you 
criticize the driving around here, is because you want 
to be first off the line and it makes you mad when someone 
beats you to the punch. Face it, you want to leave them 
at the light so they'll have to get behind you. You need 
to speed everywhere and you are afraid they will get in 
front of  you. You even speed up the driveway giving me 
whiplash when you slam on brakes to stop. Then I hear 
bags of groceries hit the floor. As far as all this other 
trivial mess you are ranting about, this is the way of 
the world and you are not going to change it by whining. 
As for cell phones, they are very useful when you need them. 
How do you know that these people aren't making a 
serious effort to get to someone they care very much about? 
Also, I don't think people intentionally block the aisles.
It isn't always about you. I don't see it as an emergency 
to get to the cookie or candy aisle but no one had better 
be standing in your way.... as for the doughnut aisle, 
people, WATCH OUT.  Just because you are considerate 
about leaving the area when you get a cell phone call, 
does not mean that everyone will extend the same courtesy. 
I don't agree with you when it comes to texting while driving  
(and I saw in the paper the governor agrees with me).  
You think it is all right and continue to do it, putting 
our lives in jeopardy each time. Why do you think I offer 
to do it for you? So we all have our faults but you just 
seem to have a habit of pointing out everyone else except 
your own. Of course I have found over the years that THAT 
has become my fate in life. At least in your life...she said.
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